MIDLIFE EMERGENCE

At age 41, the author led a life that seemed nearly perfect. She had a successful psychotherapy practice; a loving husband, Craig, who had a lucrative job in tech; a happy 10-year-old child; and a beautiful, sprawling house complete with a pool. So why did she feel like she was about to explode? “It was as though a tectonic process had taken over my solid, internal landscape, moving the plates of my identity enough to expose peeks at my molten core,” writes Berlingo in her introduction. “Much like a dormant volcano, from the outside my life appeared stable, peaceful, and lush, but a fiery magma brewed deep within, yearning to see the light of day.” An invitation to a monthlong retreat for female healing practitioners in Colorado led Berlingo on an unplanned journey toward rediscovering herself. In doing so, Berlingo became fascinated with the concept of the midlife crisis (or “midlife emergence,” in the author’s preferred parlance) so much that she reoriented her practice toward helping women go through similar rediscoveries of their own. The book is meant to assist readers in recognizing and satisfying that craving for “more” that may develop as they enter their 40s. The author explores concepts from psychotherapy—as well as New Age concepts including chakras, energy, and the like—while discussing her own experiences with chronic pain, queer desire, an unspooling marriage, parenting, and getting her nose pierced. The author’s prose is generally smooth and ebullient, as here when she describes agreeing with her husband to try an open relationship: “I was ready to tear down the walls I had built around my heart. Once Craig and I opened ourselves to the idea that we would venture into this together, I immediately felt my heart expand and the container widen. I felt more whole, more full, more loving.” There’s a lot of spiritual lingo involved (chapter titles include “Quaking Within” and “Honoring the Ebb”), but midlife readers who like a bit of mysticism with their self-help will find in Berlingo a nonjudgmental guide.