Tomorrow’s Itinerary for the Geese in My Apartment Complex

0500: Sound the alarm. 0600: Recitation of the day’s mantra in the traditional spirited honking. 0700: Singing of “O Canada” and flyover in standard formation. 0800: Announcement of the flock’s minutes. 0830: Synchronized shitting and breakfast on the east bank of the retention pond. 1000: Gather outside the dog park fence for the “Taunting of the Mutts.” 1200: Preening and beautification. 1300: Loud meandering. 1430: Stop traffic. Honk. 1600: Group aerobics at the retention pond. 1800: Carnal activities. 1802: Bathing. 1807: Carnal activities. 1809: Unwind. 1900: Synchronized shitting and supper on the north bank of the retention pond. 2100: “O Canada” reprise and flyover in standard formation. 2200: Sleep / carnal activities.